Change is great. It’s also difficult, and stressful and sometimes a bit painful. No matter how much we want to change our lives, implementing the change and keeping the wheels turning is hard. Well, at least I think so.
People are lying if they insist that they never have a ‘wobble’. An almost fell off the horse but regained balance quickly enough to not fall off the horse moment. Whether it’s because of a bad situation, illness or a struggle with mental health, wobbles happen – and they’re a part of life.
The forecast charts on business TV shows never show a plateau or a wobble, so it’s easy for us to think that they shouldn’t really exist – if Hollywood or Netflix don’t believe in wobbles, why should I? – but you’ll know if you’ve ever lost balance with what you’re doing that the wobble isn’t something to hide from. If it happens, it will happen and it will probably make you regaining your balance and galloping off into the sunset that little bit sweeter.
Wobbles help us, you see (jeez, how many more times can I say wobble?).
We don’t have bad mental health days or setbacks for no reason, they’re most often caused by exhaustion, miscommunication or indecision and so are almost always signs of us losing our way a little. What happens when we lose our way? We tend to think about what we want and makes changes accordingly.
Sidenote: When I say mental health days, I mean days where low mood, anxiety or panic tend to overwhelm us. I am in no way suggesting that clinically diagnosed depression or any other diagnosed mental disorders are the result of bad decision making. Just nope.
So, having a wobble doesn’t mean we’re weak or lazy. Having a wobble means that we need a respite to reflect on why we’re feeling unsure and either make a change or give ourselves a kick up the butt because we do want this (we just haven’t had enough sleep in the last few days).
I know it’s not just that simple though…
Say it’s a wobble
When we have moments of insecurity or of feeling unsure, it’s very easy to get swept up in what other people think of your wobble.
Those who maybe haven’t seen you as much lately might just assume you’ve slipped into old habits by choice, or those who’ve been changing with you might feel let down. In cases like this, I think it’s a good time to embrace what you’re going through – be honest and say it’s a wobble because it is.
Although it’s not an overly serious word, it’s the only one which accurately describes the situation. Saying what is happening clams any panic people may be having. To me, wobble means that you just need some time and space to regain balance and start making progress again. It’s not a backwards step, it’s a brief fling with habits that you’re saying goodbye to – and some habits are hard to break.
Embrace the reminder
Often during a wobble, we once again get comfortable with our old choices or feelings. Sure, it might feel comforting for a day or two, but we’re quickly reminded that we made change for a reason.
I’ve had a bad few days this week and even though I’ve known they were bad days, part of me felt comfortable and content with the idea of just staying like this forever – it’s not overly progressive, but I feel safe and okay. After a day and a half, however, I started to remember why I’ve pushed myself and forced myself to change over the last few months, and no matter how comfy my pyjamas are, it can’t be ignored.
It’s normal to panic about change, but outgrowing a previous part of your life is an irreversible thing and (no matter how bad the day) there’s no going back permanently. A wobble means you’re seeking comfort, but don’t confuse this with seeking your old comfort zone.
Wellbeing and wobbles are both things I could go into so much further, but for today I think I’ve said what I need to (and heard what I needed to hear). Wobbles are real. They’re not steps backwards and they’re usually just there to remind us why.
Yes, they can feel shit and if people don’t understand them then it can feel even shitter, but if you’re having a wobble right now (or coming out of one, like me) then I hope this little essay on them has been of some help. What sort of help who knows.
Do you have wobbles after big life changes? If you’ve recently had a wobble about something then let me know how you tamed it and why you think we have wobbles at all. It’s official, I’ve said wobble too much and now it doesn’t sound like a word.
It’s totally a word, right?
Did you know that I’m doing Blogmas this year? Check out my other blogmas posts right here.